Big Changes & Tough Decisions // My First Post as a Full Time “Blogger”

Sunday, April 8
three things:
i moved flats, left my job and neglected this blog SO far to the point where it would almost be an injustice to bloggers to call myself their 'fellow' anymore

but it's time to change that.


leaving my job was not a decision i took lightly and i won't be going into the nitty gritty about why i finally chose to do so; it was certainly no reflection on the people themselves and i fully believe i'm a wiser, more confident human for working there

what i will say is, it's a decision i've been contemplating a long while. and as time went on, those gut feels we all tend to ignore but realise we probably shouldn't, grew stronger. my happiness in the situation grew weaker. and so i took the plunge. i'm my own agent. the world is my oyster, yada yada. but what this really means is i need to focus on this corner of the internet which has almost sole-handedly got me to where we stand today. provided me with the option to give up working for others and have a go at being my own boss. given me the chance to transform a tiny, old, time-filling hobby into a pretty fun and rewarding, yet difficult nonetheless, career. and it's high time that it, and you guys (if any of y'all have actually been patient enough to stick around), get shown the respect you deserve.


what i'm wearing

jacket | c/o & other stories
top | c/o new look
trousers | c/o missguided
hat | c/o new look
bag | gucci



personal standards are what predominantly keep me from posting so often. thrown in with a lack of inspiration, of course, until i think ~ but am i really lacking inspo or is the topic/blog post i want to produce just not worth putting out there?

note: i wrote 'personal' standards. because this is in no way discrediting those talented humans (some of which i am v lucky to call my pals) who are able to post so regularly, consistently and eloquently to say the least. side referencing chlo and soph mainly here tbh. 10/10 not biased about the fact they own two of my favourite blogs on the internet

the issue lies here:
if i have only a few lines to say, i won't say them. if i don't have enough 'decent' pictures to fill a post, they'll be restricted to a shorter life on our beloved 'gram (you'll be surprised at how many times this has happened). but who made these rules? who determined that those words amounting to a paragraph (probably a sentence in some cases) weren't worthy of being shared? that those four images (out of four hundred, let's be real) don't deserve a space on my own, personal internet shelf?

short answer: me. i decided. and do you know what? i don't even know why. *story of my life* alert.


SHOP THE LOOK



i can also appreciate i'm not alone on this subject. and this is no 'woe is me' piece, don't worry. just one of those rare, self-observations which has actually helped and not hindered

so i thought it may be worthwhile to anybody thinking similarly.

and with that, i've decided to lower my standards a little. allow myself to post more often with less words. maybe even loads of words with little imagery but only if it's flowing. hell, if i can ramble so much in every insta caption, why can't i share half the pointless bs i spew over here? it goes down surprisingly well on there (don't ask me why). i still can't promise i'm going to be the world's best blogger. and i still can't admit there won't be weeks where this space is left untouched. but i'm making a vow to be easier on myself. kinder. more accepting. something we're all programmed not to be.

you're now probably wondering how the totally irrelevant, initial mentioning of moving flats fits in here. well, to be honest, my first thoughts were that i should probably just update you; been a while, seemed like a good idea. but secondly, i finally feel like i have some sort of home again. and it's been a long time coming. actually wanting to spend time where you live is a whole new phenomenon after an unfavourable, previous place and that, on top of going full time has given me ... i'd like to say a new lease of life but let's be honest, there's still days i struggle to get out of bed, put on pants and face the world. a fresh outlook is more appropriate here.

it's not easy to change your mindset. but it is easy to change little aspects of your life. don't get me wrong, moving house and quitting your job are absolutely not 'little' things and should be approached with much research and rationalisation. but altering your morning/evening routine, exploring a new area, making a new connection (or reigniting an old one) or even walking somewhere you'd usually drive or get the bus, can help considerably

now, will somebody please send over some advice on kittens? furry friends are quite clearly the true key to world satisfaction and i want in.